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Tuesday, September 19, 2017

Inspiration #285: when you're with the right person

Sometimes in a relationship, you can get that moment of clarity when you realize that the person you are is exactly who you always hoped you would be. If you're in a relationship, and you feel this way, then that is an excellent indicator of the fact that the person you are with brings out the best in you. Maybe he challenges you to raise your own bar. Maybe she doesn't let you slide on the promises you made to yourself about being your best possible version. Maybe the reflection that you see in his eyes, is one that finally makes you proud of all of the hard work you put into being the kind of person your grandmother knew you could be.

If you look at your life right now and the people who are in it, do you just smile? Do you look at that goofy/sleepy/imperfect/loving/perfect/ face of the person you are with and think "Yup, I chose well!"? Yes? No? Not sure? I think the not sure part can be the hardest to navigate. Nothing is really wrong but nothing is really right. You're fine (I dislike that word so much and have banned if from my vernacular) but not great and not awful. Life just unfolds every day like it has for every day since you can remember. You can't remember the last time you did something nice for someone or when someone did something nice for you. That's not the life you were meant to have.

Your goal in life should be that when you fall into bed at the end of the day, that someone else's life was better that day because you were in it. The great thing about that is that magically, it makes you feel good too and that just strengthens the desire to keep acting this way. We do things because they feel good. I don't know anything in my life that feels better than when I've acted lovingly towards someone (even an animal) and they look at me with that moment of love. It feels like all these little happy pink lights in my heart suddenly turn on.

Life is ridiculously short.  It is.

Life is about surrounding yourself with people who make you feel secure and and loved without bounds. When you are secure, you act in a way that is brave and strong and right.  You want people who make you feel good about yourself. I don't mean someone who is always complimenting you. (Ugh) What I mean is someone who makes you feel like the kind of person who would naturally feed a quarter in a stranger's expiring meter or holding the elevator door for someone who looks late for work (especially if you're in a rush yourself). When you're with the right person, it clicks in you. You don't have anything to prove to anyone. You just know that this is who you want to be.

If you don't have someone in your life who makes you feel like your best version, you can either accept that you don't feel like you deserve better or you change the situation. Talk to the person in your life. Work on it together. If that doesn't work, then sometimes it's better to be alone than to live an inauthentic life with someone who doesn't appreciate your gifts.

You have many gifts, sunshine. You are literally overflowing with gifts that are uniquely yours. You have no idea how incredible you are. Isn't it mind blowing when you realize that YOU are the only version of YOU and that YOU are the only person in this entire world who can make someone happy in your own unique way?

Today, go be brave. Go be you. Go be your best version. Know that someone's day is about to be made because of you.

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